Normal

 

Last month, i said it was time for a change.

Last week, i said it was time for a change.

Yesterday, i said … do i smell toast??? AM I HAVING A STROKE?! Rubber baby buggy bumpers Rubber baby buggy bumpers Rubber baby buggy bumpers.

Today, i said it was time for a change.

It’s an ongoing process. It’s like Groundhog Day… only i’ve never actually seen that movie, so i really have no idea what i’m talking about.

I’ve been in a strange limbo of employment as the theatre for which i am the Production Manager is in the process of relocating. (For the record, relocating sucks. Don’t do it.) It has left me with more free time than i should have. I don’t know what to do with so many free evenings. What do hip people do these days? Do they hang out at the bar? Do people still bowl? Do they just meet in the park for disc golf by moonlight? Because while they’re out doing that, i’m getting dressed up and taking selfies.

Like a goober.

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When i take photos of myself, i feel different. For that brief moment, when i view the photos, i feel beautiful. I feel normal. I’m not weeble wobble. I always tell people…

“The key to a good photo is to look at the camera the way you want others to look at YOU.”

I’ve been receiving compliments on my photogenic nature my whole life. Well… except for THIS period…

denim

(Middle school dance 1988)

It is so calming and encouraging to see yourself in photos and know that it really IS you. You didn’t try to trick anyone with fancy photoshop or smoke and mirrors. And to know that, if you can only find that perfect storm of light and angle in daily life, someone else would see it too.

But life is seldom full of perfect circumstances.

In a perfect world, all of this free time would have me living in an immaculately organized home.

And i’m not even going to stress you out by providing photographic proof of this failure.

I still live in the hope that tomorrow will be the day. I’ll wake up with a purpose and a drive to conquer this mounting pile of kitsch i call a living room.

clean

You can help me reach this goal by saying a prayer, offering positive thoughts, or drinking the blood of a virgin.

Tomorrow we’ll talk about what i hope to accomplish in the coming weeks and how i plan to get my groove back, like Stella.        …ok, that’s another movie i’ve never seen and really all i know is that it stars Angela Bassett’s arms, so these cafeteria lady arms i’m working with might make it a tough transition.

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